Thursday, April 30, 2009

Poodle-boarding as torture...

Now, I'd like to preface this post by saying that I am against torture and I am fully aware of the seriousness of this debate. I know it probably comes as no surprise but I feel that it needs to be stated. Torture = bad in my book.

Having said that, I have found myself the victim of a particularly cruel and inhumane form of torture over the last several months... Poodle-boarding. Put yourself in my shoes:

Every night the 17 year-old toy poodle climbs into bed...(she has a collapsing trachea so imagine a barking sea lion as a poodle and you get a better idea of how this plays out.) Now picture that every 2 hours without fail the poodle will wake up, hack repetitively, climb over you, and hack some more until you awaken to lift her out of bed so she can drink copious amounts of water and then need to go out to have a wee-wee. (yes, I said wee-wee in regards to my poodle's bladder... in my defense, I haven't actually slept in months.)

Repeat over and over again until 5 in the morning when the poodle is finally tired enough to actually sleep until 7:30 when you must get up anyway to start the day. Now add to that one extra little delight I had last night. I gave her a dose of her ineffective coughing medicine last night at 3:00am when I just felt I had to try something to get some sleep and she proceeds to do the following:

Poodle climbs into bed:
Poodle begins hacking as if her whole body is shaking apart:
Poodle begins convulsing and hyperventilating uncontrollably:
I realize that I have somehow inadvertently poisoned or harmed my dog and will be feeling guilty for the rest of my life:
Poodle serenely hacks up a giant gob of YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW! and said medicine all over the bed:
Poodle happily settles back down to sleep for two more hours.

Now, I think under the Geneva Convention I'm due some sort of compensation, don't you?



On another non-torture related note, please check out my nephew's photography blog and leave him some comments. He's my sister's son and I think could really use some kind attention. He's very interested in learning more about photography so feel free to give him feedback and encouragement if you can.

Hope your day and weekend is filled with peace and tranquility. I'm going back to the coast this weekend for a girl's weekend and let's face it, to get a break from the poodle-boarding.

Hugs,

Jan

7 comments:

Kristina P. said...

That does not sound pleasant!

Jan Holt said...

Kristina, you are so fast you commented even before I finished my clean up posting! It is NOT pleasant. Perhaps though SuperDell could use some poodle time?

bodaat said...

ok i shouldn't laugh but i did. her hacking was just too funny!! i wish you both well on your night time journeys. :)

Jan Holt said...

I'm glad you did laugh!

Ryan Ashley Scott said...

Oh, I wish I'd have read this before getting a puppy! In seventeen years, my son will be taking Sprinkles with him. ;)

Anonymous said...

I both giggled and felt for you when I read this post. How old is that dog now? She was an old lady when we left Oregon!

Wishing you a good night's sleep!

Love, Angela xxx

Anonymous said...

Tried to leave a comment on Aaron's photography blog but it's not set up to take messages from anonymous people - which is fair enough I suppose - I just can't set up another account because the part of my brain devoted to storing passwords is now definitely full!!! :o)

Can I leave the comment here and you could pass it on? Thanks.
-----------------------------------
Hi Aaron!

I'm a friend of your Aunt Jan and I'm enjoying looking at your photos. Keep it up - you obviously have a good eye ! I shall bookmark your blog and visit again.

Best wishes, Angela